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Anelle

The Squirmy Puppy Pub

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oh shit I keep forgetting who I've spammed with pics and who I haven't

 

Mosey on over to the pet topic where I'll put a post together here in a bit!!

 

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Every time I see the Indie General thread, I have a brief moment in which I'm like "oh shit, an indie gaming thread that's so relevant to my interests that it physically hurts*" followed by another moment in which I just sort of blink owlishly for a second or two while remembering that it's for indie wrestling. I'm typically left feeling equal parts sheepish and amused.

 

(* maybe a slight exaggeration, but yanno)

 

Also I am completely and utterly exhausted due to back to back nights of downright awful sleep. x_x

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Fuck this week has been especially bad for sleep. Last night I kept waking up from weird ass dreams including one that made me wake up fucking crying and I didn't know why. 

 

Today I helped friends load up their moving truck, and of course they were on the 3rd floor :bawling:.....fuck my body hurts. :skull: even after a shower and them treating to ayce Korean BBQ.  

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My arm hurts, two of my teeth are fucked up, my meds make me a zombie in the mornings, I keep getting dragged for being late when I'm going as fast as I can, I just have to make it in to work under sedation from the next county! ... and I'm fucking up at school. It's also become glaringly apparent that I have ADHD and always have done. 

 

I have a week off though. Going to get me some doctor and dentist appointments and try and get back on track.

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hope things get on track smoothly!

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Fuck that's rough. Hopefully they can get shit done fast for you. Be sure to try and rest up! *hugs*

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On Thursday, I discovered that some transphobes had found my Twitter account and started talking shit on me. I ended up deleting a few of the posts they had responded to (one showing my updated drivers license with all the important info blacked/blurred out), and blocked a ton of people as well. At the time I didn't think much of it, as I was at work and had a multitude of things to keep my brain occupied, but when I laid down to go to sleep it hit me pretty hard. I left the TV on for a distraction (had a sleep timer on), but still ended up crying a little bit.

 

I was okay pretty much all of Friday, went down to the bank to have my name updated, and was pleasantly surprised to be called by my new name (I had emailed the person I had an appointment a copy of the court order, so they knew the name going in), which made me feel pretty good. I don't think I had any issues on Friday, but at some point during Saturday morning it hit extra hard. 

 

Thankfully though, I spend my weekends with my boyfriend now, so having him around definitely made things easier, and we had a wonderful day together. I think I'm okay now, but it's hard to say for sure. This was something I knew was going to happen eventually, and this was my first time dealing with it, so that most likely made it worse.

 

On a more positive note, the 23rd marks two years on hormones, and on the 6th of June it'll be a year with my bf, so there's a lot of positives to look forward to.

 

 

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:love: <--closest thing to a hug emoji we have here. 

 

I'm sorry you had to experience that from those turds. You have come through a lot and you know we all love ya and have your back here. Proud of you with what you have accomplished to get to here! :love3:

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@MT I'm sorry you had to deal with that, transphobes are honestly the fucking worst and have no real value outside of being loaded into, and shot out of trebuches for fun and profit. Even at the best of times, having to deal with that sort of harassment and bullshit is exhausting at the very least. Honestly, the sheer amount of casual transphobia, homophobia, racism, misogyny, etc that's on display on internet makes finding safe, bullshit-free communities incredibly difficult, unfortunately.

 

That said, preemptive congrats on hitting two years on HRT! That's quite the milestone. :3

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On 5/7/2021 at 1:00 PM, Chel said:

Every time I see the Indie General thread, I have a brief moment in which I'm like "oh shit, an indie gaming thread that's so relevant to my interests that it physically hurts*" followed by another moment in which I just sort of blink owlishly for a second or two while remembering that it's for indie wrestling. I'm typically left feeling equal parts sheepish and amused.

:rotfl: 

 

 

Make a thread in the Games forum about indie games and all will be well in the world again. It will probably get more activity than the indie wrestling thread. Most of us are interested in games but only a handful of folks here have wrestling brain.

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sparkle.gif.1d29dc26154c3628912be8804533cb08.gif

 

I may end up doing just that in the near future.

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2 hours ago, Chel said:

@MT

That said, preemptive congrats on hitting two years on HRT! That's quite the milestone. :3

Thanks! It doesn't feel like two years, but it's been an interesting journey.

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Today starts a long ass week of 9 day straight work week. :riiight: Mainly because I asked for time off next weekend so that I can do a friends small vaxxed bday gathering. For preparation I am practicing test cookie decorating for the occasion. She likes the Untitled goose game so I'm finding ways of how I want to decorate it and this is test #1. Not too terrible for first attempt. (I was testing cutter sizes too to make sure how much space I had to work with)

20210512_155722.jpg

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Bought a used Nissan Leaf full electric car this weekend since our backup car was just about to take a shit. It will be my every day commuting car since my wife works from home. IMG_20210529_152739.thumb.jpg.abb523845e9a069da5174f94e8241639.jpg

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oooh give us a review when you've used it for a while! I'm very interested in getting an all electric in the future

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I have about a 45 mile round trip commute but that can change depending on where the next construction project is located. 

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One of my friends got a Hundai Hybrid and he's been loving it. He got to get a real good drive into it heading down to OR and back.

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Had surgery on my nose/sinus today, can't remember the name. My face hurts. Hopefully it helps and I'll breath better and snore less. Just have to wait 2 days for them to pull the packing out of my nose, mouth breathing sucks. 

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Deviated septum procedure? I can't remember what it's called off the top of my head either but sometimes i desperately want that for myself. Hope those 2 days go quick and you can enjoy your nose breathing again 

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Septoplasty and submucous resection turbinate or something like that. They did 2 things.

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Damn I couldn't imagine having to deal with that aftercare. That right up there with my mom's eye surgery aftercare where she had to stay in a chair that kept her in a chair face down for like a week or two. Hope the healing goes fast! 

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Feels like I got punched in the face and I have the biggest stuffy nose ever. 

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Midnight now, I hate my face and nose. This part sucks. Mouth breathing only is the worst. 

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That sucks. >< wish there was something that could be more helpful dealing with it. 

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Literally felt like the doctor was pulling my brain out through my nose just now when he took the packing out. OMG did that hurt. I was literally shaking for a couple minutes. 

 

The relief was immediate though, like 70% of the pressure just disappeared. I can breath through my nose again and talking is easier too. Just have some stints left to take out on Wednesday. 

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Living up to the squirmy part of the topic title I see. :shudder:

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For those who i haven't told via discord or zoom.

I'll be taking a hot air balloon ride with my dad and bro for Father's day. My brother arranged it since apparently my dad has been leaving hints. And he rarely does hints on gifts. We'll be taking a 3-3.5hr flight for Sunset. 

 

While I'm excited....I'm also freaking out because my brother and I both are terrified of heights. 🤣

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The Heat Dome has settled over the Pacific Northwest and I think Alberta too. Apparently it's gonna be 48 degrees Celsius on Monday.

 

This is going to go well :rip:

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I'm legit scared for a lot of people up there... We had people fuckin' die here with the snow crisis because we ain't prepped for that type of shit and heat kills too

 

stay hydrated and safe y'all 

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Anelle take your weather back!

 

Overall when I haven't been at work or at a friends place, the temp at my apt here has been fine. Because of where my apt is positioned:

-Small timeframe of sun hitting us

-We have rhododendron Bushes and a giant tree blocking 90% of that time frame. 

-Bottom floor and hardwood for majority of thus place. 

So just gotta run fans, open windows and put blinds down. All set. 

Yesterday at a friends' birthday we did Pride themed and the biggest water balloon/pistol fight. It felt so fucking good. 

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woah woah woah now, I don't want that weather either :rotfl: Don't have a choice though, it'll happen here anyway. There's still so much concern over Texas's stupid ass power grid that I'm scared for summer here too. fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

 

god a water fight like that sounds divine. We did a huge group one several years back and it was so much fun! I think the bulk of kiddos in our friends group are big enough now to where we could put one together again.... hmmm.....

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We had I think roughly about 900 water balloons? idk we were mixing between the easily mass produced easy fill ones and the slower filled ones that we got impatient, and like 20 various water guns. It felt SO FUCKING GOOD.

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Big adulting today. Especially since it's been forever since I had to do a car loan (last time was car #2/4). I mailed out my payoff check for my car loan today. I requested the confirmation letter to give me some peace of mind since it should take about 10 business days for the paperwork of my title to get to me. But if all goes right, it should be fully mine by the end of the month. 

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HELL YEAH

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So after much of a delay for the last few months and other stuff happening the last couple weeks. My room mate is fully moved out and in with his GF. And tonight marks the first night I am living on my own, without any room mates.

For those that don't know, I have always lived with a room mate, I once lived with as many as 5 at one point but never truly on my own and alone since moving out of my folks house. The only reason this has changed now is about last year or so when the (now gone) room mate had approached me saying that he and his GF had talked about wanting to live together after they have been dating for about 2ish years at this point. Which I totally get. But I did not want to live with him AND the GF because I've been down that road before and while I have nothing against his GF, no red flags or anything. I didn't want to go through that set up again. Which he understood but was sad about it. And around here trying to find reliable room mates through friends circles (let alone through strangers and adding COVID into things) I ended up doing math and things in my head and I figured I could attempt to finally just be without room mates. And they were able to get an open unit in our complex here just in one of the buildings next to mine so he's not far and we both are having an open door policy since we've essentially been platonic life mates for over 15 years. So there's that.

We just got done doing dinner treating friends  who helped moved the last of boxes and furniture that needed to be moved and currently sitting down having a drink and more or less processing some thoughts that I haven't had a chance to between work and trying to do social life with the state re-opening fully here.

I won't lie I'm in a weird head space right now. I know I'll be fine in the end and enjoy being alone in this aspect but right now....it's really weird.

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Oh man, that's a big change for sure!! I've never lived by myself before either, sometimes I wish I had for a bit just to learn how to better be alone but that's not how things worked out so guess that's a flavor of life skill i'll continue to lack in! I love that your roomie is still gonna be close and accessible, that should make things easier for everyone, but still very intimidating! Come in here and holler at us if you get lonely, unfortunately for you some of us Center roomies will never ever move out >>

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Thanks bebe. One of the reasons I didn't want to go through trying to find another roomie other than covid was strangers are a hard pass vs possible consideration back when I was like 20. And a lot of my friends are either in relationships or are going different paths. So this was something that I knew was going to be inevitable over time.
And as long as rent doesn't go up, I should be able to cover his share of rent okay. I've already got money put aside that I started since Mega (using his gamertag nickname for reference) and I had first started talking about this last year. I already pay the utilities because they were cheap enough here and now that the car is being paid off I'll have 1 less debt to take up space and can put into rent and other debt tabs. So why not?

 

I've also had a lot of people reach out to let me know if I need anything, just say so. Buuuuuut I'm shitty at reaching out so we'll see how that works. :lurk: I promise to take picks of before stuff and after I redecorate and reorganize stuff or give a tour of the place at the next Zoom meeting.

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Passed the year's Open University with a "Grade 3". (Very Shit)

 

Have booked a GP appointment, I aim to get signposted to an ADHD guy. 

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Congrats!

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Been a hot minute since there's been an update post here and I'm sorry its one of ill tidings.

My dad had texted me yesterday so having the call from my mom this morning wasn't too surprising. But my grandmother had developed a fever recently and was having trouble breathing. Probably from something she had ingested mom thinks. But she passed away this morning.

I am okay, red eyed for sure after talking with mom but I'm OK. I'm personally surprised she's held out for so long after so many falls (1 where she somehow survived breaking her neck) and fevers. Being stuck in a bed for the last few months, barely being "there" or responding even though we know she could understand well enough if you talked to her. My mom and I are pretty sure she's only held out so long because of my grandpa and making sure she was there for him because of how long they've been together. I am thankful she was able to finally able to let go peacefully and comfortably with my dad and his siblings there, and that she can finally rest. My grandpa seems to be doing okay with this transition since all the intermediate family is there, my brother and I had talked to him on the phone a bit. I'm also glad my dad can be less worried about her with her health flipping so much in this last year during a pandemic.

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Jesus, that's a lot. I'm so sorry for your loss, but I'm glad that, as you said, she was able to let go peacefully after all that. Love ya, girl. Hang in there.

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The facility made sure she had drugs and oxygen to keep her comfortable. when dad told me last night what was going on they were expecting her to last maybe the week. So I'm very glad it didn't drag out that long for her. We've also had crazy stormy weather up here including tornado warnings in some spots so my dad was lightly joking how she is going out with a bang. I know I'll remember her best when cooking/baking because majority of my stronger memories of her is at gatherings and her always prepping the best food in the kitchen. One of my favorite cookie recipes are hers.

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What kind of cookies? 

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Butterscotch chip oatmeal cookies. :betty: I make them every Christmas

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hhhhhhhh those sound amazing

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they are the fucking best. you can either make them crispy or nice and plump gooey and i always do a mix of both cuz some of my friends love the crispy ones more.

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I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother, Tassi. :( Hope you're all doing ok in the circumstances...and I'm sure she was always really proud of you, especially inheriting her baking skills. :heart: (Those cookies sound amazing!)

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So, Me and Desi went to a picnic last Saturday to Celebrate a Co-Workers birthday and as we were leaving we saw a couple carrying Wallabies out into the grass to play.

 

Cute and Strange since we're in Tennessee.

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GONNA TALK ABOUT SOME SAD SHIT SO FEEL FREE TO IGNORE I JUST GOTTA TALK SOMEWHERE AND I CHOOSE HERE

 

Our cat, Oobie, has had some dramatic severe weightloss in the past few months, we got him checked in Feb and they ran all sorts of tests and all the numbers looked great so we thought it was just stress because a lot of shit was going down in our house around then anyway. We gave him some appetite stimulant and he began eating and eating and eating like he used to and appeared to be on the way back up weight wise and then that just stopped and he's pretty much skin and bones. We took him back today, fully expecting very bad news, but it still fucking hurt when the vet discovered a tumor down by his kidneys.

 

Oobie is FIV+ and we always knew that something like this was likely going to come up at some point, but you always hope for more time, you know? Especially considering we lost 2 years with him. A door got blown open and he slipped out and was lost for 2 years. We searched daily for months, I went to the city animal shelter a few times a week to check for him. Put up posters. We ended up adopting Tater during our search because someone called us thinking they'd found Oobie and we fell in love with this other lil cat that needed a home and he fell in love with us. We didn't give up looking for Oobie, but Tater helped us heal. Then one night Lee comes home real late and has to park in the far back lot of our complex... and as he's walking towards our building he sees a familiar cat. Thinking he's just being wishful, he calls to it and it runs up and greets him like an old friend..... he'd found Oobie. I will never forget that night as long as I live. We got him back. After 2 years. By some miracle, we were granted more time with him.

 

The FIV has always made it seem like we got him back on borrowed time (or, as the vet encouraged me to think of it--- "bonus time") so there's never really been any doubt this day would come but.... yeah. I'm devastated, y'all.

 

He's getting steroids to hopefully keep the tumor under control and let him put some weight back on, and other than being scrawny he's still his same happy self. He's joyful, he wants snuggles, he's enjoying his food and begging for treats. So basically the clock is ticking, and as long as he is happy to be here we're going to be happy to have him. When he's ready to go, we won't try and make him stay. Even bonus time has to end sometime, but we can still enjoy it to the last.

 

anyway, hug your pets or something i'm just being a crybaby bitch

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I'm so sorry to hear that :(

 

Gonna give Kanari and extra big hug tonight, which he will inevitably use as en excuse for biting my hand.

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